Laments

Lamentations -

"She who was a princess - has become a slave"

"Among all her lovers - she has none to comfort her"

"Look, O Lord, and see"

"He has left me stunned,

faint all the day long"

"My transgressions were bound into a yoke -

by His hand they were set upon my neck"

"My eyes flow with tears; for a comforter is far from me"

"The Lord has become like an enemy"

"The Lord is in the right"

"The Lord has swallowed up without mercy...

in His wrath He has broken down...

He has brought down to the ground in dishonor..."

"The Lord has made Zion forget festival and Sabbath"

My ruin is as vast as the sea - who can heal me?

"He has filled me with bitterness - He has sated me with wormwood"

"I have forgotten what happiness is;

so I say, "My endurance has perished;

so has my help from the Lord

Let me put my mouth in the dust- there may yet be hope

My pursuers are at me neck;

I am weary; I am given no rest

Renew my days of old-

unless you have utterly rejected me,

and you remain exceedingly angry with me

Daniel 10 -

"Then he continued, "Do not be afraid, Daniel. Since the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to them. ¹³ But the prince of the Persian kingdom resisted me twenty-one days."

¹⁷ How can I, your servant, talk with you, my lord? My strength is gone and I can hardly breathe." ¹⁸ Again the one who looked like a man touched me and gave me strength. ¹⁹ "Do not be afraid, O man highly esteemed," he said. "Peace! Be strong now; be strong." When he spoke to me, I was strengthened and said, "Speak, my lord, since you have given me strength."

I love revelation from the Lord!

Haha, but who doesn't?

I really enjoy those times when a verse hits you later (in this case about a year) and you have a significant spiritual understanding of it that is assuredly the Holy Spirit telling you deep truths. A couple of days ago I was reading Isaiah and paired it with Hebrews - which I've been reading often. This passage is from Isa. 28. Earlier in the chapter, Isaiah is talking about how the land will be destroyed and is basically bringing bad tidings. I had read this passage before, but I didn't quite understand it. To me it sounded like Isaiah just started teaching me how to garden.

²³Give ear, and hear my voice;
give attention, and hear my speech.
²⁴Does he who plows for sowing plow continually?
Does he continually open and harrow his ground?
²⁵ When he has leveled its surface,
does he not scatter dill, sow cumin,
and put in wheat in rows
and barley in its proper place,
and emmer as the border?
²⁶ For he is rightly instructed;
his God teaches him.

²⁷Dill is not threshed with a threshing sledge,
nor is a cart wheel rolled over cumin,
but dill is beaten out with a stick,
and cumin with a rod.
²⁸Does one crush grain for bread?
No, he does not thresh it forever;
when he drives his cart wheel over it
with his horses, he does not crush it.
²⁹This also comes from the LORD of hosts;
he is wonderful in counsel
and excellent in wisdom.

Then I read in Hebrews 12:

⁷It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline?⁸If you are left without discipline, in which all have participated, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. ⁹Besides this, we have had earthly fathers who disciplined us and we respected them. Shall we not much more be subject to the Father of spirits and live? ¹⁰For they disciplined us for a short time as it seemed best to them, but he disciplines us for our good, that we may share his holiness. ¹¹ For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.

Anyway, I read these two, but didn't understand they were related until later in the day. But I see now that they are both about discipline. It's clear to see how in Isa., right after promising hard times to Jerusalem and using harsh words - like 'beaten' and 'crush' - to describe it, he offers them solace in the fact that it won't be the end. And the author of Hebrews (though more frank) explains the necessity of discipline. The verses kind of speak for themselves, but in all of this it is great to know that in disciplining us, He is excellent in wisdom.

A few thoughts

The Lord has been very good to me in Midland. I had such a hard time here, but prayer has solved every problem I have ever had in my life. And so it has been a good almost-three weeks.

There have been a few things the Lord has spoken to me, & one of them is a prayer of my heart.

The first one occurred as I was reading Daniel, which I don't know why, but the Lord led me there. I read in Daniel 10, when Daniel had a vision and a man, or "one having the appearance of a man," spoke to him and in verse 12 tells him: "Fear not, Daniel, for from the first day that you set your heart to understand and humbled yourself before your God, your words have been heard, and I have come because of your words." I was really touched by the characteristics used to describe Daniel: he set his heart to understand and humbled himself before God. Those are two things I have been praying a lot about for myself.

Secondly, as I was driving, I was uncomfortable with some social situations (as I usually am...) and I was praying panickingly, not really expecting the Lord to answer, about all of my anxieties and worries. And then He calmly told me, I am the orchestrator of the world. And I thought, wow, what a great God we serve that He even answers frantic, senseless prayers. Anyways, what was cool, was that in the end, I am very certain that everything happened exactly as the Lord intended, with more blessings to be had!

Thirdly, in prayer, I was comforted by the Lord's Spirit in knowing that I have need for nothing else in this world because I have Jesus. What a great prayer! The Spirit brought me such peace in this, it's indescribeable! I thought, what else do I need? Nothing! We have need for NOTHING with Jesus!

This last note means a lot to me, mostly because coming out to Midland was not easy. It may have been the most difficult move-of-faith in my life. I left my family and friends and came out here, with Jessica going to the other side of the world. For about a week I would brood a lot, and I was working myself into a little depression. Before, I never would have said I struggled with depression, but in that first week, I would have readily admitted it. But Satan is a theif of joy, and seeks only our destruction. The Lord saved me from so much. Not because He gave me more and changed my circumstances, but because He reminded me of who He is. In Him we have life in abundance.

I also started reading the cost of discipleship. I can't believe I never read this before, and I partly have caroline to thank for this. I'm only in the second chapter where he's talking about the call to discipleship. It's about how obedience and faith are intrinsic to each other, and one thing he repeatedly says is "only those who believe, obey and only those who obey, believe." I'll have more thoughts on this book as I get further in. It's by Dietrich Bonhoeffer, and YOU should read it.